Friday, July 30, 2010

Communication with Nature #26

Pace my feet slowly
Speed of light, speed of leaf drop
lets tears of freedom

I have not written a haiku in years. Interesting. I wondered if there was a specific purpose of a haiku for this activity. I realized that haiku’s are total creative freedom in the context of a format. This reminded me of nature. Total freedom in the context of natural laws. If I don’t know the context of my experience, then my freedom becomes disconnected from nature and can be destructive. I had always avoided haiku’s because I thought them unnecessarily limiting. I see now that this is not accurate. I feel a connection to many human practices that are seemingly connected or derived from nature.

I have been a bit consumed by the oil spill and my relationship to the cause of this catastrophe. I have been even more actively lowering my carbon foot print and more attracted to change my everyday functioning. I am very scared for my son and all of nature in these seemingly crucial times (by this I mean more than any other time to date). I have been realizing how the days of carefree living are over. This was producing a panicky anxious hopeless feeling that was causing me a lot of problems. I was avoiding my school work, my work work, my parenting, my intimate relationship, and my band. Everything just seemed meaningless compared to the oil spill and the threat of more disasters. I was considering going down to the gulf to try and help clean up (which I may still do). This produced such intense emotions and I was not able to support them. I was starting to lose it. I could see this occurring and used the tools I have learned here and with nature to help me through this. As I wrote earlier, I received many messages from nature that helped me. I feel like I am gaining the nature supported position to be able to experience what is happening without being swallowed by it.

I am to the point that I trust nature enough that know that, whatever happens, each moment experienced in connection to nature is forever and that’s enough for me.

The Health Benefits of Music | Mark's Daily Apple

The Health Benefits of Music | Mark's Daily Apple

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Communication with Nature #27

I did this activity at the beach. I am always attracted to the ocean. I started to name all of the Natural Attraction Senses that are connected to the ocean and in a few moments I felt this singular focus where everything else faded into the background. It is exactly like being in a trance. I could feel the connection to the ocean and all of its senses. I asked the ocean: “What do I do now?”
The communication came as an ineffable feeling, but felt something like “more of what you are doing” and “ use all your senses” and “follow your heart”. It was all sort of saying: you are part of me and I am part of everything, you have all my senses and I have all of yours, the outcome is not certain, live fully today.
The tide was coming in…
I did this with my partner and she had an amazing experience as well. It told her that everything is always changing and it’s ok to change.
The next day I had another leaning connection with the ocean. There was a strong rip tide and I was walking against it. I was paying attention to the sensation of straining muscles. I noticed suddenly that when you go against the flow you get stronger and when you go with the flow you go faster. Hmmmm…I never experienced it THAT way before! Awesome!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Communication with Nature #25

I went to the park I frequent for these activities, old (new) friend. I followed my attractions and found myself at a turn in the creek where several trees had more of there root system showing than usual. I was attracted to these roots and the trees and the creeks turn. I was not focusing on my thoughts, just my attractions and being open to anything I didn’t fully trust in nature. It hit me quickly like it came from behind me. The question I asked nature was, “How can I trust something that created us humans? How could you have made something so seemingly unnatural? Something that doesn’t follow the rules of nature?” The answer came as it often does, as a feeling. And then a little bird told me, “Live Now, yep yep yep (yep = yes around here with our language accent). It repeated this over and over. I felt this existential peace as I received the message, “live now, cause things are not looking good for us humans and really this is a preferred way to live anyway.” I received the message that I need to do anything and everything I was waiting to do or putting off. Like telling someone I love them or healing old wounds. It was in no way depressing or hopeless. It was like: “each moment is precious, don’t miss any of them!” This was in support of living in ways that bring hope and joy. I have to admit that my first thought about it was to give up and do all of the harmful things I used to do to myself. Within a split second, I realized that that is not living now and that I am not attracted to that. I felt supported in knowing (being aware of) all the suffering and in not causing my own suffering. I feel different somehow. The question of how humans came to be the way we are is the biggest and last barrier to trusting natural attractions and nature in general.
Because these things happen simultaneously and not in a straight line, it is hard to convey these ideas very accurately with narrative. Another question I asked was why nature created so many things that are dangerous to us humans. This answer was more clear and direct. Nature said that every species needs predators to control population. This makes sense to me. I had a thought as I was taking the message in. This thought was: maybe people became somewhat conscious that they had been repeating the same life over and over again. They became aware of past lives or the connection to the never-ending nature of life. Maybe some humans tried to figure out how to solve this never-ending life thing because they were tired of cyclical suffering aka the loss of people that they loved. Maybe they realized (not fully consciously) that the only way to beat the law of nature was not following the laws of nature. I felt like they would be scared of this at first and then see some benefits and few downsides. Not knowing, ultimately, the effect this would have, pursued this way of life. And then we wake up a few thousand years later in the state we are in today.

New Friends!

Take a look at Star Rocker. You'll find original music, sobriety, and running!

Take a look at mind body psychotherapy. There is great stuff on connecting the mind and body to heal traumatic wounds of the past and present. Includes hypnotherapy, one of my personal favorites!